Costumes . . . Who Do You Want To Be Today?
Posted: Sunday, October 02, 2011
by Octavia Hansen
Octavia Hansen
Halloween, or All Hallow's Eve, is coming up fast . . . Oct 31, a Monday evening this year. Are you ready for the little ghosts and goblins? Are YOU ready to dress up and deck out this fanciful time of the year? It brings out the kid in everyone. There are parties, games, gifts, scary movies and great food. Pumpkins aren't just for carving, there's a great pie to be made out of these orange beauties! The year is cool enough to enjoy, not so cold you can't dress up in your alter ego.
What? You're not ready? This comes around every year! This is no surprise. How can you NOT have a costume wardrobe? In this day and age, you will be called upon to become something you are not, and the easiest way to achieve this is by a costume. There are costumes that will serve you well all year.
Have a renaissance costume always ready. It's great for any renaissance gathering or festival, and always available for Halloween. It doesn't have to be brocade and velvet like Henry VIII. I'm talking something peasant, something worker, something comfortable with a medieval tone. Watch a few movies and get the idea -- large shirt, baggy pants and sandals. For women, I wonder why 1600s dress ever went out of fashion. Every woman looks great in a peasant top, fitted bodice and a long flowing skirt. Errol Flynn's "Adventures of Robin Hood" is great for the tights look, that and Mel Brook's "Robin Hood: Men in Tights." (I liked it when he referred to it as Blazing Sherwood.) Not every man can wear tights, it's a gift. Still, it took my gal friends and me many years to convince a certain man to wear velvet tights. When he did, not only did he feel good, but every lady at the fair wanted to touch the velvet. He has thanked us many times over the years.
Never under estimate the resources of a thrift store. Instantly, and usually for under $20, a woman can become a bride, a flapper, a geisha, a cheerleader or punk. Men can pick up a football jersey, a waiter's jacket or a tuxedo. Everybody can be a graduate, cap and gown come together in tacky colors and one size fits all. There is camo wear for everyone, funny shoes, stupid hats and accessories like hair nets, curlers, bats, hockey sticks and animal toys. Right after Roy (of Siegfried and Roy, Las Vegas magicians fame) had his tiger attack, one of my friends wore a silky, clingy shirt with a toy tiger pinned to his back -- everyone got it.
Movies offer a lot of costume ideas. A hat, a whip and casual clothes and you are instantly Indiana Jones. Find a gal in a beaded dress and it's The Temple of Doom all over again. Hoop skirts are harder to come by for Scarlette O'Hara, but anything in fitted black can be a ninja or The Matrix. Don't forget, a house coat and pajamas is always comfortable and ready to go to a party. And it's washable. A woman can accessorize with a frying pan, hair in curlers and a facial masque, preferably in green or blue for contrast.
Any adult store has a costume section. Every man knows the thrill of a French Maid, a Nurse or Wonder Woman. Every woman knows the excitement of a policeman, a Top Gun pilot and Pirates of the Caribbean. Oh, the fun everyone can have! Don't forget a thong or edible underwear to complete the ensemble.
For more conservative costuming, men have the advantage of an easy fashion -- a Monk's robe. Simple -- easy on, easy off, a rope belt, sandals, wear anything under it and be comfortable. Nun's habits are more complicated for on and off and more difficult in public. Evidently a lot of men's fantasies are to make it with a nun. The one time I donned a habit, the unwanted graphically sexual advances became too much after a few hours and I had to change to street clothes.
And even though it's not a costume . . . Carlos Santana, the extraordinary guitar player for many decades, is now designing women's shoes. Great, a man who will NEVER walk in these things is designing high heels. Okay, fair is fair. If he gets to design women's shoes . . . I want to design men's jock straps! I'll be kind -- as kind as my squished, strapped and toe walking feet will be in those shoes, a man's most fragile and sensitive body parts will be held in the same comfort, security and safety. Yea, and when pigs fly we'll have light bacon!
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