Octavia Hansen

A Woman's Handbag -- A World Within A World



Posted: Monday, January 30, 2012

by Octavia Hansen
Octavia Hansen

Ah, a woman's handbag. Just about every woman carries one. She probably has at least a dozen, for different occasions and outfits. It is a portable closet, a make-up station, an office, a lunch counter, a garage and a treasure chest of what has passed and what is to come. Purses used to be known as wallets but fashion changed and a wallet became a separate entity. No man wants to be accused of carrying a purse, even when it's the monetary object of a prize fight.

In the olden days, a purse dangled on strings from a belt. Thieving children figured out that when someone was distracted, it was easy to snip the connection and make off with a small treasure. Thus, "cut purse" was a serious crime. In the days when everything was a cash transaction, credit and travelers checks were not in use, people carried cash, a lot of it, to finance their work, shopping or travel. During the Crusades, a knight had to carry as much cash (usually gold or silver) as needed to cover his entire trip, there and back, for an unknown length of time. Quite a sum was required, which was the focal point for many raids and massacres long before their quest was complete.

But we are talking purses here. Over the last hundred or so years, purses are objects of a specialty crime -- purse snatching. Considering that a woman's entire life is stuffed into these portable fashion statements, they might as well have a bull's-eye on the side. Money, checks, credit cards, sometimes jewelry can be packed into these little vaults, but when the safe is that portable, how secure can it be? Some women have been dragged to death hanging onto their purse. Some men, with the noblest intentions of apprehending a purse snatcher, have been killed by a retreating thief.

Some women, whether defending their honor or their finances, have been known to use their handbag as a weapon -- easy to swing, compressed enough to make a considerable impact on a head or body part. Any time I have to tote something heavy I like to say it doubles as a weapon in a barroom fight.

I have gal friends who tote bags weighing as much as twenty pounds. I have NEVER asked what is inside, I don't have that much time and it's a VERY personal question for any woman. It's not like these ladies are exercise fiends and a dead weight such as this is building up their arms. I think it's a modern security blanket -- bring enough of home with you and you will feel secure. Strange, that the women I see carrying the largest handbags NEVER go inside to retrieve anything.

Most handbags are a fashion statement, supposed to match or enhance an outfit. Considering today's fashions, that's not much of a statement. There are bags worth thousands of dollars. I'm cheap. A thousand dollars is a weekend away somewhere, sometimes an entire week when I watch the money. High fashion means something is 'out' of fashion a lot longer than it's 'in' fashion. It has been said that if you hang onto something long enough, that it will come back into fashion . . . again . . . someday. I don't have that much time nor am I optimistic enough to think my taste will endure the tests of time. I go for function instead of fashion. There is profit for fashion houses to go for trendy and short term.

Handbags come in a mighty range . . . clutch, pocket, micro, jewel studded, evening, formal, travel and more. Whatever you might need to carry, there's a handbag for it. I don't see how women put up with a pocket size bag. If it's pocket size -- use a pocket. I'm used to being far away from home, sometimes an unexpected overnight stay, so I'm prepared. Nothing less than a duffle-bag-size will do. As much effort as it takes to tote a large bag, it's also less of a target for a thief. Also, bright girl colors are big a deterrent -- no man, especially a criminal, wants to be caught with a PINK handbag.

I learned to live without a handbag when living in London. You have to keep your hands free to jump on and off buses, in and out of the tube, sometimes a taxi or two or three. There's a reason there's a grab-handle on almost every surface and you will use it.

When I do carry a bag, it's enormous and I'm a self contained unit. One of my gal friends said she'd want to be shipwrecked with me . . . I'll bring my own boat. Got that right!

Gals, to protect your valuables, get a bag with a shoulder strap and wear it diagonally across your body. Cute as an advertisement is with a strap over one shoulder, you will constantly be pulling it up and it's an easy snatch for any passing thief. Great advice: have your keys and small packet containing your info and credit cards on your person, in a pocket, in your boot or in your underwear. If anything happens to your purse, you can still get home, still have your valuables and your life.

I love a handbag but it's not always practical. Even if it isn't stolen, it can still be left behind in the heat of the moment. I NEVER carry anything that can't be replaced, this includes makeup, family photos and any of my jewelry, fake or real.

Still, Master Shakespeare was so right in "The Tragedy of Othello, The Moor of Venice," when Iago says: "Who steals my purse steals trash." (There's more to this quote but this is the bit I live by and have always remembered.)
Octavia (Yes, that's her real name!) is a busy gal in Las Vegas, NV. From New York City parents and Texas birth, she began in the best of both worlds, literate and comical. Extensive US family travel in her younger years, now she's on her third passport and numerous cars driven to pieces in the name of wanderlust. The Big O settled in Las Vegas, which she compares to running away to join the circus - IT'S FUN! Comedy and alternative thinking come easily. When she's not writing, she sings, she writes songs, produces her own CDs, attracted to shiny objects, looks stunning at renaissance festivals across the country and is only stopped by lack of time for all the projects she has in mind. What a woman!
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